ONE THOUSAND YEARS

As Cabin Fever starts to kick in, I've suggested to Wilson that he might try to involve the family in some kind of artistic activity to distract them from lockdown.

After a moment's thought, he said he would find positions for everyone in his Virtual Vermilingua Contemporary Gallery – starting with Uncle Zoltan.

He is going to ask Uncle Z to help him recreate Damian Hirst's 1000 years installation piece.

I was pleased to see W attempting a rapprochement with the truculent hornet as their relationship in the past has always been a difficult and hostile one.

Only later did I begin to wonder why Wilson had immediately chosen irascible and belligerent Uncle Z for his first project…

After only a few moments research I learned that the original 1000 Years consists of a glass tank, live flies and an Insect-o-Cutor machine!

I rushed into the kitchen to tell Wilson to cease work on this immediately!

He was reluctant to stop at such an advanced stage of construction, until I asked him how he proposed to explain Uncle Zoltan's untimely death to his nieces Polly and Billi…