THIS IS AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT

AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT

(And for once, it does not involve mis-sold Payment Protection Insurance)

Wilson suspects that a scurrilous paparazzo may have used a long lens to shoot some topless photos of him. 

If you come across them, perhaps in some French or Italian Celebrity Scandal-Mag, or on the Internet, he begs you not to look at them as it would cause him extreme embarrassment.

A world of mystery...

This morning I brought my coffee in to the living room, and I found Wilson shouting the word 'NOW'. 

I asked, 'For what reason?'

And he said, 'How?'

And I said, 'What does this mean?' 

And he screams back, 'You're a cow. Give me some milk or else go home.'

I just don't know what to think; I feel like a prisoner in a world of mystery…

It must be vinyl...

Aha! As soon as Wilson heard me discussing the vet, he almost immediately returned to talking normally. He said that before, he had been trying to perfect his 'Bob Dylan' voice, a sort of husky, laryngitic croak such as a heavy smoker might make first thing in the morning. 

Even now his normal voice has miraculously returned, W has started speaking only in Dylan lyrics. I recall he did the same thing with John Lennon lyrics last year… and that was no less annoying than this. 

In the picture, you can see Wilson sorting through his recently-acquired Dylan albums. I already own all this stuff; I sold the vinyl years ago and bought it on iTunes. But W says the only way to listen to this is on vinyl, which he has bought quite expensively on eBay. Together with a record player. All sent Express Delivery.

Something is happening...

Wilson's voice is down to a croak now, and I can hardly understand what he's saying. 

He's been trying to tell me something all morning and I think I've just made out what it is:

     'You say you lost your faith but that's not where it's at,

      You have no faith to lose and you know it'

Also, he keeps calling me "Mr Jones".

Something is happening, but I don't know what it is.

I think I'll have to make an appointment for W to see the vet. I hope he doesn't get referred to see the Pet Psychiatrist again, he was really expensive… but if that's what it takes, I'll bite the bullet and pay.

Model Village

Wilson is considering building a Model Village in the garden. He says it would be a great draw for people visiting his Grand Charity Garden Open Day. 

I remember he was very impressed by a model village we visited on holiday. In the one he's now planning, however, he says that there could be a model Industrial Estate or Factory Farm, where he could breed his ants. 

W's voice is going a bit croaky -- I hope he's not coming down with something.

Dylan Revival

I've been playing quite a bit of Bob Dylan in the car lately -- I seem to be having a bit of a Dylan Revival. 

At first Wilson was very dismissive of what he described as "hippie crap", but now he's quite gotten into it.

In the car now, we drive along with the windows wide open singing along to Black Diamond Bay, Buckets of Rain or Ballad of a Thin Man, while pretending we're in a Buick 6 on Route 66!

Dentist

The dentist assured Wilson that sTony's teeth were not decayed, and that the discolouration was due to moss growing in the cracks. She sold W a toothbrush and a tube of Smokers' Whitening Toothpaste.

W was so relieved, saying, 'At least poor sTony won't need an injection!'

I don't remember receiving this much sympathy or concern when I last visited the dentist. If I remember correctly, Wilson called me a "big baby"...