05/01/2019

POOR TIMING

Once Wilson and Byron had carried the boxes of records into the dining room (where they will no doubt languish until next Xmas) they both sat at the table staring mournfully into space.

Wilson held up one of the vinyl singles and stared at it morosely.


'This,' he said, 'could have been the UK Xmas No1 hit record… if only my timing had been better.'


He sighed a dejected sigh. 


'Now, we shall never know. I might as well convert them all into Novelty Flower Pot Holders…'




04/01/2019

YOU HAVE MAIL

This morning I came across Wilson and Byron contemplating two large boxes which had just been delivered. 

They contained 45 rpm records – Wilson removed one and showed it to me. 


'It's my Xmas Single, Do The Ants Know It's Xmas?' he explained. 


'When I ordered them I thought I could cash in on the Vinyl Revival – but I hadn't thought it through. Nobody will want to buy Xmas Records in January – it's the most un-Xmassy month there is…' 

Byron asked W whether he'd like any help moving them through to the dining room. W thanked him, and between them they began to carry them through.


I tried to cheer him up by pointing out that he'd be all ready to go next December…



02/01/2019

Ant Wars 2: NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS

On New Year's Eve I came downstairs to breakfast and found Wilson's New Year's Resolutions magnetted onto the fridge door.

This year there are only two, so perhaps he's in with a chance of keeping at least one of them!


If Uncle Z persists with his drumming, I think I'll be making a bulk purchase of noise-cancelling headphones for the whole family, so #2 will be taken care of; as for being Better Off, W's been trying to achieve that ever since he came to live with me – without success, though not for want of trying!
___________


Wilson, Byron and the rest of the family would like to wish you all a Very Happy New Year!
We'll see you again on Friday
🙂


 

01/01/2019

BEES' BLOG

Hello. We are Polly and Billi The Bees, this is our Guest Blog and we'd like to wish you a Very Happy Random Calendar Date!

As you know, we'd usually be telling you exciting Bee-Related News at this time, but instead we're busy fly-posting (well, technically we're bee-posting!) posters to advertise Uncle Zoltan's forthcoming tour.


Honestly, we're just pleased to be out of the house and away from the incessant drumming noises, and the sooner Uncle Z goes on tour, the happier we'll all be!


Anyway, we've been The Bees and we'll see you again next month – until then, BEEEEEEEEE QUIET!


(Ooops – Freudian slip! 🤔)




31/12/2018

BOXING DAY

Uncle Z loved his Xmas gift from The Bees!

When I say he loved it, I mean he REALLY LOVED it! He hasn't stopped playing with it since he opened it on Xmas Morning, which is why he absented himself from Xmas Night's games.


Honestly, by now his constant, incessant, unremitting and relentless non-stop drumming is starting to be a tiny bit annoying – not helped by his almost total lack of timing.


However, what Uncle Z lacks in rhythm, he more than makes up for in enthusiasm and tenacity. 


Also volume – for a tiny insect with a tiny drum kit, he makes a LOT of noise! 


I think even The Bees are beginning to find it a little bit wearing…
__________


Tomorrow being the First of the Month, it will be Polly and Billi's turn to Blog, so you'll have to wait until Wednesday to find out about Wilson's New Year Resolutions.
In the meantime, Everyone here would like to wish you a VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR! 




30/12/2018

XMAS NIGHT

In the evening, everyone divided up into two teams to play Taboo – a game where you must describe something without using certain words. 

Much drink was taken, many rules were argued over and many challenges made, so everyone had a brilliant time. I don't even remember which team won!


I can't think why we don't play games more often, even when it's not Xmas.


When I say everyone played Taboo, Uncle Zoltan opted out as he was 'otherwise engaged' – of which more tomorrow. 


His absence was probably for the best since, whenever Uncle Z or his team starts to lose at anything he tries to put his opponents off their game. 


By stinging them. 


Have you ever been stung by a Hornet? I don't recommend it…