Wilson seemed lost in thought as we proceeded into the next room of the mill.
'Actually,' he announced, 'a hundred years ago I might have been a Rich (but beneficent) Mill Owner instead of a Poor Worker. My credentials would have been perfect!'
'Credentials?' I asked, 'You know a lot about milling? Or cotton? Or flour?'
'I am ambitious!' he replied, 'I am VERY ambitious!'
He broke off the conversation while he attempted to stop Antony and TT climbing on the machinery — it felt a lot like watching myself trying to stop HIM climbing over the exhibits at the Rochester Naval Dockyards Museum a year or so ago…
Once the children had been apprehended and given a warning, we headed outside to the Museum area, and Wilson told me a joke.
'Okay, New Dad, the Past, the Present and the Future all walked into a bar.' He paused. 'It was… tense!'
His shoulders shook in silent laughter.
Inside the Mill, Wilson confidently explained to Antony and Tiny Toy that, if they'd all been born a hundred years ago, he'd probably have had to work somewhere like this, sleeping under the machines, living on a diet of fluff and getting his tail caught in the Spinning Jenny, while Antony and TT would be on the streets selling flowers and matches respectively.
The Bees, he continued, would have had to take in washing and do minor garment repairs whilst the sTone Brothers, if they were very lucky, might have procured employment as paper weights in a rich household.
The children were greatly impressed by W's knowledge of history, so I didn't like to mention in front of them that this is a flour mill, not a cotton mill.
________
Incidentally, Wilson has asked me to say Hello to all his new readers in Germany, Portugal, Ireland, Australia, France, India, Romania and Russia: so WELCOME, ONE AND ALL, to the WONDERFUL WORLD OF WILSON!
Before we left the railway, Antony and Tiny Toy saw a little coin-operated ride they wanted to have a go on. They've done so little on this holiday that I was more than happy to let them, as long as Wilson went on too, to keep an eye on them.
Wilson rather grandly announced that he was 'a bit too grown-up' for these 'baby rides' but he would 'sacrifice his dignity' in order to keep the children safe.
I fought down a smile as I remembered W not being AT ALL too grown up to go on very similar rides on the pier a few days ago… but I suppose he IS a few days older now!
Anyway, he popped TT on the chimney and Antony behind the steam dome and told them to hold on very tightly, before climbing onto the footplate himself and, with a big grin on his face, inserting the coin.
Wilson sat on a bench spitting sand out of his mouth for a few minutes, pausing only to remark, 'This is what happens when you eat sandwiches for lunch! Hahaha! SANDwiches! Did you see what… oh never mind.'
When he'd finished he said that, as he was right by a phone box, he thought he might telephone his Mum, Mrs Vermilingua, to tell her about his holiday.
I suggested that he might like to send her a saucy postcard too, like he'd sent to The Bees.
A shadow passed briefly over W's face and he shuddered. 'I don't think so,' he replied, 'Mrs V is not really a "Saucy Postcard" sort of person…'
Without warning Antony suddenly started giggling uncontrollably. Eventually he got himself under control and gasped, 'SANDwiches! Oh, that's good!'
On our way to the café Wilson happened to glance inside some sand-filled Fire Buckets hanging from the Ticket Office wall. Noticing some ants living in the sand, he plunged his nose in, and came up chewing.
Popping Antony and TT each into a bucket of their own he pointed at his new-found bounty and asked me whether I wanted any. I declined.
As he chewed enthusiastically on a mouthful of ants, he asked me, 'How much more is there to see on Wight Island, New Dad? Have we nearly seen it all?'
I said there was much yet unseen, but if he was feeling homesick we could head back to Uckfield whenever he liked.
'Oh no,' he said, 'I'm having a brill time here… it's just that it's getting quite close to Halloween… and Guy Fawkes Night… and Xmas... and I wondered whether we'd be home in time?'
I promised that we'd be home in good time for Halloween.
Glancing at one of the other Fire Buckets I noticed that TT had built some teeny-weeny sand castles.
'Also,' Wilson continued, pausing to spit out some sand, 'I've invented a top new Family Card Game and I need to get it in production in time to hit the lucrative Xmas Market!'
Once we had all re-detrained (Wilson can be extremely pedantic at times!) W and the children went to the front of the train to thank the Driver and the Guard for a very nice journey and for not crashing the train and killing everyone.
Notwithstanding his recent ice-cream — which was apparently 'medicinal' so didn't actually count as food — W announced that the journey had given him a massive appetite and he was in urgent need of sustenance.
Antony and TT both concurred, saying, 'Yes! Yes! What he said!'
