ROBBED!

For years now I've enjoyed the University Boat Race. Wilson only found out about it last night, but since then has been looking forward to seeing 16 men pitched muscle-to-muscle against each other. When the race started, he was astonished to see only two boats - he'd been expecting 16 rowers in 16 boats.

I've always supported Oxford, and W chose to do so too, because 'they have a nicer colour', so we both feel totally robbed by the result. What a fiasco!

I'm just getting Wilson's Easter Egg ready for tomorrow. It's a Thornton's Dark Chocolate egg, filled with ants. 

You'd be surprised how difficult it is to make ants go somewhere they don't want to go - I keep telling them it's only until tomorrow, but still they keep escaping from the egg.

Last minute shopping

I've just had a call from Security at Tesco. I thought Wilson was in the shed/studio filming Titanic: The Film, but it seems he'd snuck into Uckfield to do some last-minute Easter Egg shopping...

Filming begins!

Production of Titanic: The Film has started, but all is not going well. 

Antony (Cameraman) has been made to stand outside because of 'artistic differences' with the Director. (Bottom LH corner, if you look closely - does he look contrite yet?) 

When he's had a chance to 'think about what he's done' he will be allowed back inside to continue filming.

Preparations for filming

Wilson has now taken over the garden shed to use as The Wilson Vermilingua OBE Film Studios. He's thrown out all the useful things, like the lawn mower, garden tools, recliners and so on - all of my things, basically - and he's inside building scenery and 'rigging lights.'

Notwithstanding all the work on the shed, we did make time to go shopping, where W was very excited by the amount of Easter Eggs on display. He's really looking forward to Easter.

Wilson has another big idea(!)

Wilson has been re-thinking his objection to CDs being too old-fashioned, and now he wonders whether he could open a museum of 'old-fashioned things like CDs' to raise funds for the Sloth Orphanage. 

I asked him what sort of things he could put in his museum apart from CDs and he told me, 'Old stuff! Stuff people don't use any more, like handsaws and floppy disks. TVs that aren't flat. VHS tapes and newspapers.  I shall call it The Wilson Vermilingua OBE Museum of Old Stuff.' 

I objected that he sometimes bought newspapers himself, so they couldn't be so out-of-date. 'I only buy the papers when I'm in them,' he replied, 'to put in my clippings library.'

Because he is so young, anything more that a year or so old is 'antique' to him, but most people have still got things like that in their sheds, so I can't see them shelling out hard cash to look at W's display of it. It would be like a visit to the local recycling centre!

April fool...

I purposely hadn't mentioned April Fools Day traditions to Wilson, so I was surprised yesterday to find myself strangely disorientated. Throughout the morning he made tiny adjustments to all the clocks - each too small to notice - until I was shocked to find it was actually early evening and dusk was falling, and I had not yet had lunch! 

I dropped a hint about the CDs, and Wilson was pretty scathing. In fact, he said, 'CDs are so totally 20th Century. Are you thinking of opening a museum or what?'

I pointed out that he had brought out two CDs himself, but he replied that the physical media were 'merely to promote MP3 sales.'

Titanic!

Wilson has been reading articles about The Titanic in this month's National Geographic Magazine, and while we were in Eastbourne he asked me to take his photo as he recreated an iconic scene from the movie. 

Since then, W has binned the Jerry can scheme (phew!) and decided instead to re-create Titanic: The Movie. He has has already produced the poster and hopes to begin shooting the movie soon. To keep costs to a minimum, he intends playing all the parts himself, and right now he's sitting in the living room fashioning a Captain Edward John Smith beard out of tumble-dryer fluff. 

Antony, Wilson's plush toy anteater, will be chief cameraman; W says he learned a lot on the movie studio tour, and he's certain Antony will be up to the job. As long as the camera doesn't have to move, presumably.

Wilson has not actually seen the film, so he probably doesn't know about the nude scene…