Bowling Tournament

We hired a lane and I showed Wilson the rudiments of how to bowl and how the game was scored. He practiced a bit, then we started on our Best-of-Three-Games challenge.

In the first game W Guttered most of his balls, and he lost dismally, but in the second he suddenly found his stride and narrowly beat me. In the third, and deciding, game I got the feeling that he was letting me win… until the last minute, when he vanquished me again.

He immediately suggested we play Best-of-Five, so I could get my own back — which I failed to do — and by the time he'd beaten me in Best-of-Seven we were both too exhausted and hungry to play on.

As we left, Wilson shook my hand and said, 'Thank you for the game, New Dad! You've been a tolerably worthy opponent... for your age.'

The important thing, though, was that we'd both enjoyed the final evening of our holiday.

10 Pin Bowling

My ace card suggestion for our last night on holiday was: Ten Pin Bowling! 

Wilson was gratifyingly enthusiastic about this idea and immediately challenged me to a Best-of-Three tournament, which I accepted. 

W said that he was hot and his sugar levels were low and before embarking on this important contest he needed a boost. 

He ran off to a Slushy stand and asked for an Ant Slushy. He was very surprised to learn from the lady who worked there that they didn't have any Ant flavour Slushies, and indeed that she thought they sounded 'Horrid!'

In compensation for this egregious omission he blagged a lot of extra drinks decorations, and as he walked away tipped some dried ants into the lurid mixture, stirring them in with a plastic flamingo swizzle stick.

Amusement Arcade

Once we were back on the pier, Wilson had me hold all his souvenir purchases while he played on the Penny Pushers and other amusement machines.

Being a very canny player, it took him a surprisingly long time to lose all his money. 

Which, by the way, is quite boring to watch.

However, when his loose change had finally all disappeared, I played my ace card…

Trade Secret

Once we arrived back in Great Yarmouth Wilson stocked up on sweets and souvenir sticks of Rock with 'Great Yarmouth' written all through them. 

At the back of the shop you could see the rock being made by a team of women and a dangerous-looking machine, and W whispered to me that he could actually see how the writing was being put in! 

'We mustn't tell anyone about this, New Dad!' he told me earnestly, 'This is obviously a Trade Secret to which we have inadvertently become privy — if it becomes generally known in the confectionary industry it could spell the end of the Seaside Rock business altogether!'

Exit through the Gift Shop…

As I anticipated, Wilson had a great time at the Radar Museum, helping out the WAAFs at the WW2 Plotting Tables, then taking a turn at one of the terminals in the main Operations Room. 

Although the entire place has been decommissioned all the radar screens are still working, so I did make him promise not to touch any of the buttons, just in case...

When we finally left the Museum, through the Gift Shop, Wilson chose a model Stealth Fighter which I bought for him, because he hasn't had any other birthday presents yet — they're all waiting for him back in Uckfield.

Right now, though, we're heading back to Great Yarmouth for a final visit to the Pier...

Happy Birthday!

Wilson's Birthday Surprise is a visit to the East Anglia Radar Museum — a radar station established at the start of World War Two but still active during the so-called 'Cold War' of the 1950s onwards until it was decommissioned in 1993 and then converted into a museum.

I've been here before, and I know W will love it!

It's much larger than it looks, and we could probably spend most of the day here, but I want to take W back to Great Yarmouth this afternoon.

Meanwhile, please remember that Wilson's Mum, Mrs Vermilingua, mustn't know anything about W's birthday — so, not a word to Mrs V!

Mr Bob

After dinner we retired to the Bar, and who should we meet there but Wilson's friend Mr Bob! Over a few drinks (a few too many, in W's case!), Wilson finally let slip what he's been up to while locked away in his Museum… although he swore us both to secrecy. All I can tell you is that it sounds very exciting… if a tad unlikely!

Tomorrow is Wilson's Birthday — although that has to remain our secret, so please don't mention it to anyone. It's vital that his Mum, Mrs Vermilingua, doesn't find out, or she may calculate his true age, and that, as he explained to me, 'Would be calamitous! All would be undone!'

This will be his first birthday away from home, so I've got a surprise planned for him which I hope he'll enjoy…