Wilson has just read yesterday's post, and taken offence at it!
He says he was not 'Dozing in the sunshine' as I'd had 'erroneously' stated, but purposely remaining motionless while Nërp created his likeness in watercolours.
'In fact,' he continued, 'so far from dozing was I that I composed this Haiku to express my feelings!'
Anteater,
Dozing in the summer sun
His head filled with thoughts of Ants
I pointed out that the verse actually contains the word 'Dozing' but Wilson insisted that this was merely for poetical effect, and because it had exactly the required number of syllables to complete the Haiku.
Home again following our holiday in Margate, everything is returning to what passes here for normal.
Nërp has been inspired by Ai-Da, 'the world's first Painting Robot' to take up painting as a hobby.
Ai-Da was designed by Cornish robotics company Engineered Arts, and her robotic hand was developed by engineers in Leeds, while Nërp was designed and built by the good people at eBay…
Nërp told me he was a bit disappointed, as he could have been the world's first Painting Robot if only he'd thought of it, but added, 'Disappointment is a human emotion to which I have neither wish nor capacity to fall prey. As are Dismay, Sadness, Despondency, Jealousy, Bitterness and Resentfulness.'
I have to say, he did sound the tiniest bit all those things, but I expect that's just my imagination…
Anyway, why I mention this is because while Wilson was sitting dozing in the sunshine, Nërp painted a picture of him – and although I'm no expert, it looks pretty good to me!
Before we left the Turner Contemporary, while the lads were occupied in the Gift Shop, I bought a copy of Katie Paterson's Book of Ideas – A place that only exists in moonlight – it was quite expensive, but I think it will be a nice souvenir for Byron – I'll give it to him when we get home.
But at last it's time to leave Margate and return to Uckfield.
On the drive back we passed some seaside Beach Huts, and Nërp noticed that some of them had been decorated in quite unusual ways.
We parked the car to investigate (and to buy ice creams, sweets and comics – obviously) and went to investigate.
Someone remarked that the one in the middle should be called Spongebob Beach Hut!
Byron was characteristically quiet on the rest of the journey, studiously writing in a little notebook he'd bought.
The boys met up again in front of Vatnajökull (the sound of) – a piece comprised of a neon sign of a long number.
Wilson asked Byron, 'So, Biro – this isn't just a neon sign, is it?'
'You're right!' Byron replied enthusiastically, 'It's a telephone number. You can call it from anywhere in the world and hear the Vatnajökull Glacier in Iceland dying as it melts… it's a very melancholy sound, and a sorrowful thought, don't you think?'
Wilson considered this for some moments, the silence broken only by a performance of Earth-Moon-Earth (an automated grand piano playing Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata, the data having been transmitted from the Earth to the moon, reflected off the Moon's surface and received back on Earth, the music occasionally interrupted or altered by data-loss).
Then he asked, 'Biro, how do you know so much about all this… stuff?'
'Mostly,' Byron replied, 'I just read the labels!'
The next installation was Timepieces (Solar System) (2014)
Wilson, though, had by now stood all he could stand, and took Byron to one side.
'Byron, mate – I say this for your own good: open your eyes: it's a row of clocks – and they're all showing the wrong time! You could buy your own row of clocks from Rymans, and set them all to the wrong times, but that wouldn't make you an artist!'
Byron turned to Wilson and explained quietly, 'Wilson, the artwork is not the clocks. It's not the Lightbulbs or the DHL Package. The Artwork is the IDEA – the CONCEPT. The clocks, the lightbulbs, the package – they're just the Physical Manifestation of the Concept.'
Wilson was quite thoughtful after this, and while Byron went off to listen to As The World Turns (a recording of Vivaldi's Four Seasons played on a record player whose turntable rotates only once per day) Wilson remained looking at 'Timepieces', deep in thought.
Nërp explained helpfully that, having just completed the calculations, all the clocks were in fact showing the correct times, but for other planets, not the Earth… except for Saturn, which was running two minutes slow.
Wilson remained immersed in thought, while Nërp went off to report the timekeeping error to someone…
