Wilson and his Literary Agent, Antony, have just proudly shown me proofs of the first two spreads of his Children's Educational Book, Learning Colours and Numbers with Wilson.
It's not bad, is it? I think he might (finally) be really on to something here!
By the way, Wilson has heard from Keith Lemon off ITV's Through The Keyhole.
Mr Lemon thanked Wilson for applying to be on Froot Key'ole, but said that although he thinks Anteaters are Bang Tidy, Key'ole only visits 'ouses, not museumseses.
Also, he said he was afraid Wilson was not quite famous enough for anyone to guess who he was, but to get back to him if he gets a lot famouserer.
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https://www.facebook.com/groups/wilsonvermilinguaappreciation/
Wilson was very pleased when his Mum, Mrs V, finally passed the phone over to his brother Byron.
She'd given him quite a guilt trip about the infrequency of his telephone calls and visits, and took so long doing it that Wilson missed most of yesterday's Jeremy Kyle Show – which I personally consider to be no bad thing!
Anyway, Byron apparently has a very busy schedule of birthday parties, baby showers, murder mystery parties, karaoke parties, pizza parties, play-dates, sleepovers etc at the zoo, but could apparently spare some time over Easter… so I guess there'll be another couple of months with the garden looking like a muddy bog.
Wilson complained that when he was still living at the zoo life certainly wasn't one long round of parties – he speculated that Byron was probably more popular than him, so naturally got invited out more.
Much more…
So to pass the time (and distract himself from this unpalatable fact) W has started working on another of his projects – Educational Books For Children.
He says that this is an underexploited market, and parents will spend enormous amounts of cash to encourage what he calls intelligentness in their children…
Wilson has determined that I am 'too feeble' to be of much help with his Museum rebuild – apart from paying for things, obviously.
It stung a little when he told me, but on reflection I think it's probably fair comment, as moving the cement and bricks yesterday nearly finished me off!
So W is now on the phone to the zoo to ask whether Byron could spare the time to come over and lend him a hand.
Paw.
When he got through his Mum, Mrs Vermilingua, answered – she gave him quite a hard time about him never visiting or telephoning…
Okay, I'd like to apologise for the late arrival of yesterday's Blog.
Very early yesterday morning I heard a delivery truck outside the house, so I pulled on my jeans and a T-shirt and ran downstairs to see what was happening.
On the front drive were two massive Pallets – one loaded with bricks, the other with cement – and a worried-looking Wilson.
Site Manager Antony explained that Wilson had 'slightly' over-ordered on building materials, but it was okay because we'd easily be able to sell the leftover bricks and cement on eBay – as long as we offered to deliver, anyway.
Wilson then spoke for the first time, telling me that both bricks and cement were way heavier than he'd expected, and he couldn't carry even one brick at a time, let alone a bag of cement…
Which is why I'm only just posting yesterday's Blog – I was completely drained by carrying a pallet's-worth of bricks and 35 sacks of cement round to the back garden.
While I lay gasping for breath, Wilson confessed that rebuilding his Museum was a much more substantial project than he'd anticipated, and asked whether his brother, Byron, could come over to help him with it.
At that moment, I would have agreed to almost anything, so I nodded weakly and grunted, 'Mmm'…
Some sort of protest delegation has assembled on the Museum Building Site, determined to confront Wilson.
It seems that no-one is happy with the new Museum plans – the sTone Brothers are lobbying for a Rock Garden, so they can invite their friends round, while Nërp thinks there should be more robot-charging outlets.
The Johnson Brothers say the Museum should include a Skate Park, although Polly has forbidden them from attending in person lest the protest turn violent…
Uncle Zoltan has rocked up too, to complain about the noise – although to be fair, the only noise I've heard is the sound of Uncle Zoltan shouting, 'Stop that bloomin' noise – some of us are trying to work! Or sleep!'
