Quantitative Easing

Wilson has started Quantitative Easing of the Vermilingua, or the V-note as he now calls it. He asks that you print out this sheet of V-notes and start spending them, as this will 'aid their acceptance into the mainstream banking system.'

I asked W about the Chinese writing in the corners of the notes; he said it's not Chinese, it says "Good Luck Spending This!" in Costa Rican.

I still worry that this might not be legal, but W is very confident.

A Retail Empire is born...

Wilson has indeed started selling his excess Trick or Treat sweets from a roadside stall. Embarrassingly, it's just round the corner, where all our neighbours will see it: they're bound to notice that he's selling them the very same sweets that they gave to him only two days ago!

Moreover, he's giving them change only in Vermilinguas, the home-made currency that he's started printing. I am SO embarrassed!

Hallowe'en Haul

Wilson certainly had a successful Hallowe'en last night! He says this was because of his 'secret weapon' but he won't tell me what it was. I hope it has nothing to do with the crate of Silly String that arrived from Amazon yesterday!

I suppose the responsible, fatherly thing to do would be to ration out his spoils to a few thousand Calories' worth each day… but he's so pleased with his haul that I think rather than eat it he may just keep it as a trophy. 

Or sell it.

CHECK THIS OUT!

October has been a very busy month for Wilson Vermilingua OBE!
I've just uploaded the tenth monthly volume of Ant Wars II: OCTOBER 2012 so you can catch up on anything you've missed.
Please tell all your friends, as it is Wilson's stated ambition for his life story to be, as he puts it, "As Popular as Harry Potter!"

You can download it or read it online at:
http://issuu.com/friendlydragon/docs/ant_wars_ii_october_2012

You can now SUBSCRIBE to Wilson's blog by email!
The BLOG is right here: http://antwars2.blogspot.co.uk/
You can TRANSLATE Wilson's blog into other languages!
You can COMMENT on Wilson's blog — and he'd love to hear from you!

Photographs of the lovely WILSON are by Tamanduagirl at
http://www.livingwithanteaters.com/ and are used by kind permission.

Ant Wars II: October 2012

issuu.com

A journal of my life with a talking anteater. I appear to have been adopted by a talking ant-eater called Wilson. This is my journal, listing his daily battles with the 21st Century...

HALLOWEEN!

Here's Wilson setting off to Trick-or-Treat. He's certain he's going to get a mountain of treats this year, as he has a 'secret weapon.'

I hope he's not too disappointed; Trick-or-Treat isn't very popular in this country.

The V10,000 note

Wilson and I went out for dinner last night, and I was very surprised when he offered to pay. He brought out what I thought was a £10 note but which, when I examined it, turned out to be a V10,000 note. 

'What's this?' I asked him.

'I've been researching currency online,' he replied, 'and lots of places, Bristol for instance, have issued their own currency. It's quite legal! So I've designed the "Vermilingua"!'

'And you think this restaurant will accept it?' I asked, incredulously.

'I certainly hope so!' he replied, 'and I'm hoping they give me the change in UK Pounds Sterling – if they do, I should show a profit of about £9,960. I'll leave an generous tip, of course.'

I couldn't enjoy the meal for worrying what would happen when Wilson tried to pay with his home-made currency, but when the waitress said she couldn't accept it I paid with my plastic and there was no unpleasantness. 

Wilson left the V10,000 note as a tip. 'I know it's over-generous, but the waitress was very pretty. And I can print plenty more.'

Wilson is insulted!

This morning Wilson looked up his surname, Vermilingua, on the internet, hoping to track down some unknown famous ancestors. Wikipedia and three Dictionary sites claimed that 'Vermilingua' means 'worm-tongue'. 

W said he had never been so insulted in his life, and that this was a slur on his entire family and all his ancestors. 

He is now writing a very strongly-worded letter of complaint to Wikipedia and three Dictionary sites.

Fireworks!

In order to cheer him up and to distract him from Joni, I took Wilson to the fireworks shop today. I'd only intended to get some Golden Rain and a couple of packets of sparklers… but he managed to talk me into some Roman Candles too. And some rockets. And a big box of Bangers. 

Listening to a Gold station on the radio driving home and Pictures of Lily by The Who happened to come on; I was very encouraged to see W tapping his feet to it. Perhaps his crisis has passed.