10/06/2017

HOLIDAY PACKING

Wilson is busy packing everything he can think of in preparation for his holiday with Dennis on the Isle of Wight.

He'll only be away for a few days – I can't believe he'll have time to use half the stuff he plans on taking with him...



09/06/2017

AN UNEXPECTED INVITATION

This morning Wilson received a letter from Dennis – the Giant Anteater who lives on the Isle of Wight – inviting him over to stay for a few days.

Wilson has just RSVP'd to Dennis, saying that he'd be delighted to visit with him, and enquiring whether he should bring any Formal Attire* with him, as he knows Dennis likes to change for Dinner. 


Dennis is not only pretty posh, he's also a Role Model for Wilson – when he comes back we'll probably have to start using butter knives and jam spoons. Doilies and antimacassars. Keep our elbows off the dining table...


W was mortified at having to send his reply in a brown envelope, but I assured him that if Dennis was any sort of friend, he would understand. 


When he took his letter to the post box round the corner, he was very surprised by the poster he saw taped to its side...


* His black bow-tie



08/06/2017

ELECTION DAY

This morning Wilson was determined to do his duty as a British Citizen and cast his vote in the General Election.

In spite of his being well under 18 – and an anteater – he told me he was even willing to forego his liberty in the pursuit of exercising his Democratic Right to Vote. 


'If I don't cast my vote,' he told me earnestly, 'we might get stuck with some mendacious dummy like President Trump!'


'If they lock me up,' he continued, 'they lock me up – it is what it is! I shall go forward in the spirit of the famous Ms Emily Pankhurst!'


Accordingly he accompanied me to the Voting Station, clutching his home-made Voting Card in his paw, ready to argue his case with anyone who tried to prevent him exercising his suffrage.


As we arrived, he proclaimed loudly to a surprised group of voters in the car park, 'I am here, not because I am a  law-breaker; I am here in my effort to become a law-maker!'


However, once he saw the policeman outside the entrance to the Polling Station, his bravado deserted him.


I can sympathise with him – I feel just the same if a police car is following me, even though I'm doing well under the speed limit! 😕
_____________


You've got until 10pm to cast your vote! But don't leave it too late – there might be a queue!



07/06/2017

PICNIC AT CHESTNUT RIDGE

Wilson noticed that the bench at the top of Mallard Drive has been transformed from what previously resembled a building site into what now looks like a lovely area to sit and relax.

Now he has told everyone that he's organising a 'Picnic At Chestnut Ridge' which is what the area is apparently called.


Everybody was very excited, and they all set off together – apart from the immobile sTone Brothers, who I agreed to take round later in the car.


When I dropped them off, I found Wilson almost engulfed in flames as he tried to brew a pot of Ant Coffee. 


He said it was a temporary inconvenience and everything was under control.


I hope he's right, because once the coffee is done he intends to cook his signature dish, Ant Lasagna. I've never seen a lasagna cooked on a paraffin stove before, and I fear it may be beyond his abilities. 


I wished everyone good luck, and told Wilson I would pop home and bring him a fire extinguisher, just in case.


I sensed that Antony was uneasy about the picnic. I asked him what was the matter, and he whispered, 'I can't help comparing this to  the classic movie Picnic At Hanging Rock – I'm just waiting for the other children to disappear...'


05/06/2017

ONE LOVE MANCHESTER

Last night we all stayed up well past Wilson's bedtime to watch Ariana Grande's wonderful One Love Manchester concert on tv.

This morning I heard that over £2,000,000 – $2.6M or €2.3M – had been raised by the concert to help the bereaved and injured from the Manchester bombing. 


Billi got a bit overexcited at the end when Liam Gallagher appeared, although she was disappointed that his brother Noel hadn't turned up too. As she said, 'If Mr Robbie can sing alongside TakeThat, I think that's the least Mr Noel could have done...'


If you like, you can still contribute to the We Love Manchester Emergency Fund by clicking:
https://beta.redcross.org.uk/appeal/manchester-emergency-fund



04/06/2017

STRAWBERRY FARM

Following last year's Pick-Your-Own Tomato Farm debacle, Wilson has decided to start small with this year's new venture: PICK-YOUR-OWN STRAWBERRIES.

Consequently he has planted only two baskets of strawberry plants so he can calculate Yield per Hectare ratios, EU Subsidy Rates etc and decide how much of the garden to set aside for strawberry cultivation.


I hope he leaves a tiny corner for me to sit in the shade and read...


Polly and Billi The Bees have been entrusted with the responsibility of Pollinating the strawberry flowers, while Dave The Pig has been assigned to Guard Duty, commencing as soon as the fruit starts to ripen.


Dave is extremely proud to have been entrusted with what he calls 'this vital task'!