Wilson and Nërp appear to be bonding well, although they spend a lot more time watching television than I'm really comfortable with.
This morning I turned the tv off and sent them round to the Children's Park to play together, get a bit of fresh air and work off some energy.
Wilson had a good time, but Nërp just watched, complaining that W was using his energy very inefficiently.
He suggested that W should decide whether he wants to be at the top of the slide or the bottom, and stay there – not keep chasing round in a circular, repetitive and energy-costly routine which will inevitably result in an Efficiency Shortfall.
Wilson explained that the Sliding Down part was fun, but apparently Nërp doesn't have his Fun Module as he'd been 'otherwise occupied' on the day of installation.
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The Exclusive Free Stuff for Club Members should start appearing next Tuesday!
Something to look forward to, although I wouldn't get TOO excited – that can only lead to disappointment...
Wilson and Nërp are busy watching the Winter Olympics on TV.
The sTone Brothers are keeping well out of the way, fearing that they might be pressed into service as Curling Stones.
You may remember Wilson glueing door-handles to their heads during the 2014 Sochi Winter Olympics, and they've been a bit resentful ever since...
Nërp must be thinking that Wilson spends his whole life just watching TV, whereas in fact... Oh! Well, perhaps he'd have a point!
In other news, Tiny Toy has been chastised by The Bees for telling Robot Jokes, lest they make Nërp feel embarrassed or uncomfortable.
The joke went:
Q: Why are Robots shy?
A: Because they have hardware and software but no underware.
Nërp assured everyone that he was not in the least offended, but confessed that he had no understanding of the concept 'Joke' as he had been 'busy doing something else' on the day his Humour module was to have been installed...
Last night Wilson, Nërp and the boys watched SpaceX's launch of the Falcon Heavy Spaceship on tv. I had to warn W to be careful how he pronounced Falcon Heavy in front of the little ones.
It was very exciting, and brought back a lot of memories for me of NASA's space shots in the '60s...
Nërp said that when he was little (ie not yet fully assembled) it had been his dream to be, as he put it, an 'AstRobot'.
Later the children started running round with jam-jars on their heads and complaining that Diesel the Goldfish was 'so lucky' because he's already got a 'proper' Space Helmet!
Just before bedtime, Polly popped in to announce that Neil the Sloth had spoken again, saying not 'Tmas' as expected, but 'Froome...'
Whatever he's trying to say, it could take some time – but rest assured, you'll hear it here first!
Since the Appreciation Society was formed, back in the mists of 2015, it has continued pretty-much unchanged.
At the beginning of January this year, Wilson approached me to ask whether it couldn't be Spruced Up. Revamped. Given a Face Lift.
Consequently I proposed re-naming it the Wonderful World of Wilson!
I liked the alliteration of the name, and the way its initials (WWW) appear at the beginning of every web page, but when I put this suggestion to the vote, opinion was divided.
The votes are now in and counted, and the new name of the App Soc is... (ANTicipatory pause for 90s drum roll)...
The WONDERFUL WORLD OF WILSON VERMILINGUA!
🎂 🎉 🍷 🎶 🐜 🍸 🍾
But this will not be some empty re-branding exercise, like calling Marathon 'Snickers', or the re-naming of JIF as 'CIF' – there will be genuine NEW and EXCLUSIVE stuff for members, plus a NEW BADGE!
This is a Group that's GOING SOMEWHERE – a Group you'll be proud to invite your friends to join!
Wilson is in favour of having a Secret Pawshake too, like the Masons and the Scouts, but one thing at a time...
Another crate has arrived – smaller than Nërp the Robot's crate, but equally heavy.
Wilson and Nërp man-handled (robot-and-anteater-handled?) it into the back garden between them; Nërp then tore the crate open with his bare hands (manipulators?) revealing a headstone for Mr Juicy.
Carrying it between them round to the site of Mr Juicy's grave, Nërp dug a shallow foundation and erected the stone.
He and Wilson stood quietly by the grave for a moment, then Nërp, although he had never met Mr Juicy, gave a moving rendition of Rachmaninoff's Piano Concerto #2 in C Minor, Op. 18 (he must be equipped with MIDI) and his display flashed on and off with the message 'R.I.P. MR JUICY!'
Noticing how clean and shiny Nërp is, following the Wash 'n' Wax The Bees gave him yesterday, W is pondering on the feasibility of a Bee-Operated Car Wash.
I can't see Billi reacting well to such a proposal!
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WILSON VERMILINGUA'S APPRECIATION SOCIETY:The votes are in and counted – tomorrow there will be a BIG ANNOUNCEMENT!
If you're NOT a member, why not? It's free, and there are Special, Exclusive Benefits!
Nërp is a bit rusty and dirty after all the digging in the garden.
I'd hoped Wilson might hose him down in the yard, but The Bees thought that was a bit harsh, given how cold it is, and brought him into the kitchen where they sponged him down while singing the Car Wash Song:
🎶 Working at the car wash (ohhh, yeah)
At the car wash, yeah (come on work, baby work it, say now)
At the car wash (ahh)
Working at the car wash, yeah
Ooh, do do do do do do (woo, so), na na na ah, ooh
(You may not ever get rich, but hey)🎶
With so much soapy water flying about, Wilson kept well out of the way!
Now that Nërp has been washed and waxed, he's having a lie-down in the living room, charging his batteries. Again.
I must ask Wilson about Nërp's Running Costs...
