OAK TREE

Wilson apologised that, due to 'insurmountable' copyright problems and the fact that the original was currently on long-term loan to the Tate Gallery (who 'churlishly' refused to part with it) the next exhibit was not an original but a replica of the famous work 'Oak Tree' by Michael Craig-Martin. 

Comprising as it did a glass of water standing on a glass shelf, I had already mistaken it for a refreshments stop, but Wilson rushed to stop me reaching up to take a sip.

'You can't drink that, New Dad!' he exclaimed, 'not only is it a priceless and iconic work of art, it's not – as you may have understandably but erroneously supposed – a glass of water: it is in fact an oak tree!'

He drew my attention to the descriptive ticket, which confirmed the exhibit to be an oak tree, imaginatively entitled 'Oak Tree'! 

Well, who'd have guessed…