The watchword of a successful pirate, according to Wilson, is Preparation.
I imagine that is why he's in the kitchen with Byron and Nërp making beer mats, even though there are several weeks to go before the Big Day.
Byron and Nërp both wondered why the mats were being printed 'pre-stained' – something I had pondered on myself.
In answer, Wilson touched one claw to the side of his nose and replied, 'Authenticity! Pirates are notoriously messy drinkers, always spilling Grog. And Blood.'
Beer mats are very absorbent, and you might be surprised by how much printer ink they soak up – I should probably order another set of cartridges, just to be on the safe side.
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International Talk Like A Pirate Day, in case you've forgotten, is on 19 September – be there, or be a scurvy landlubber!
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