ARTISTS IN RESIDENCE: DEAD POPE

A few days ago the sTone Brothers set the bar pretty high with their artwork Sunny Side Up but Wilson and Byron are determined not to be outdone.

Making our way to the entrance of Vermilingua Contemporary Wilson tried to prepare me for what I was about to see. 

'The original of this work, La Nona Hora (1999) by Maurizio Cattelan,' he explained, 'was actually a Sculpture made to commemorate the tragic death of Pope Jean-Luc II who died when he was hit on the head by a meteor in 1999. The title is a terrible Italian Curse which when translated means "Your Grandmother is a…"' 

He trailed off into silence, blushed, coughed and continued, 'Well, it doesn't really matter what the translation means, but the original was recently sold for $3 million – which is why we have a recreation here rather than the original, skilfully recreated by internationally-acclaimed performance artist Byron Vermilingua!'

As I entered the gallery space I saw Wilson's brother Byron, wearing the hat Wilson bought when he applied to be Pope, lying unconscious on the floor. I ran over to him and asked, 'Byron, are you all right?'

Wilson stopped me, saying that this was, in fact, the artwork. 

'It depicts the actual moment the Pope is killed in an act of Divine Retributi…'

Wilson's commentary was cut short by the sudden arrival of Uncle Zoltan bearing a message from The Bees.

'An order has poured in for one of your Boris Johnson Dartboards,' he announced. 'Better late than never, I suppose, but Ms Polly says you'd better come and deal with it.'

Wilson asked Byron to continue the narrative of La Nona Hora and rushed back to the house.

TO BE CONTINUED…