RECORDING SESSION

Wilson has noticed a lot of tv adverts for Xmas CDs and, thinking they sound like a bit of a money maker, has liberated my old reel-to-reel tape recorder from his Museum.

The whole family has been assembled in his Library and are singing what W describes as 'All the Old Favourites' while he conducts – or at least, waves his arms in the air in approximate time to the singing.

After a couple of 'takes' he confided to me that it would sound a lot better with the help of the Animatronic Polar Bears from the garden centre singing background harmonies, and asked me whether I'd drive round there to enquire if they'd help out. He told me to say there'd be a Fish Supper in it for them – it appears he has not fully grasped the meaning of the term 'animatronic'.

He also asked me whether I'd any idea how much an Autotune™ Machine might cost.