HOLY TOAST

Wilson still hasn't heard from The Vatican, so to pass the time he's framed the Polaroid of the 'Miraculous Image' of his face on a slice of toast. 

He has converted the spare bedroom into what he calls The Reliquary and installed the picture behind curtains, which he will draw apart for a fee.

He's charging 10p to open the drapes — reduced from £2.50 — but he says that the money is all going to a VERY good cause.

I can probably guess what that is! 

Anyway, he's already taken £5.00 off me...