Having hurt his nose by wearing an ill-fitting (or 'dangerously ill-designed', as he describes it) Red Nose during Red Nose Day, Wilson has spent the morning soaking his poorly sniffer in a pot of Clarke's Miraculous Salve, a foul-smelling unguent which his mother, Mrs Vermilingua, used to use on all her children's nasal injuries.
I have my own theory, which is that the cream smells so bad that one's mind will be distracted from the original injury, but I'll be keeping that opinion to myself.
W looks very sorry for himself, but keeps saying, 'It was all for a worthwhile charity!'
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